Meles ar Maile
by OctoberGreenleaf
Summary: I loved him. I still do. Even then, while I was with him, I lusted after you. He and I are no more, but I still want you. And I always get what I want." Slash, AB, HL, AL
1. Default Chapter

Title: Meles ar Maile  
**Rating: **R  
**Pairings: **Aragorn/Boromir, Legolas/Haldir, Legolas/Aragorn  
**Summary: **_"I loved him. I still do. Even then, while I was with him, I lusted after you. He and I are no more, but I still want you. And I always get what I want."_  
**Warnings: **Slash, sex scenes, violence, rape, non-con, death, suicide  
**Disclaimer: **Let's think about this. If I owned Haldir or Legolas would I be sitting at my computer writing about them? NO! Seriously though, I don't own any of these characters, places, etc. All I own is the plot. So don't steal it. Or else you're a Plot-Stealing-Orc.  
  
**Authors Note: **The timeline of the story takes place from when the Fellowship arrives in Lothlorien to awhile after Helms Deep. I guess this should be labeled as AU because a lot of things have been changed to go with the plot. -_POV's thoughts will appear like this-_

Chapter 1  
_-Legolas-_

-Lothlorien! We're going to Lothlorien?! Not that I mind Lothlorien, after all, it is the fairest dwelling of my people. The beautiful trees, the golden leaves, the soft glow that always seems to dwindle. It is quite a site. But he_ shall be there. And the last thing I want to do is look upon his face. Well.. I wouldn't say _that_. Just as his home, he is beautiful. His golden hair, deep blue eyes, and that smug little smile he was always wearing... No! Stop thinking of him! And if I must think of him, I should think of his hurtful ways. Of his selfishness. Of the way I supposedly wasn't good enough for him...-_

Noticing the changing expressions on the face of the blonde Elf, Aragorn turned to his friend and placed a hand on his shoulder. Legolas jumped out of his thoughts quickly as he was surprised by the hand on him.

"Are you alright, my friend?" Aragorn asked, concerned. Legolas blushed a bit, embarrassed by being caught off guard. As an Elf, he should be aware of his surroundings, especially in the situation.

"Yes, I am fine. I was lost in thought. Forgive me for being so careless," Legolas replied before looking away and continuing to walk with his companions. Aragorn furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, but quickly shook the matter away. If Legolas did not wish to speak about what had obviously taken his attention, he would not press the matter. Instead, he continued walking along as well.

-I must stop thinking of all this. I am paying no attention to the task at hand. But how can I not think about this? How can I not think about him?! His voice haunts me. The way he spoke so confidently. No, not confident.. Arrogant is the better word choice here. He spoke oh so arrogantly as if everything he said was so important. He spoke as if he were trying to make himself look better than everyone else. He is just so..-

"The dwarf breathes so loud we could have shot him in the dark."

-Speak of the devil.-

Legolas looked up just in time to catch the rude look on Haldir's face as he glanced over the Fellowship.

-Figures.-

That's when Haldir's glance fell upon the Mirkwood Elf. Legolas saw the look of surprise in the Guardian's eyes that no one else could see, but he knew it was there. Instead of looking away, Legolas gave the older Elf a cold, hard glare.

****

-Haldir-

-I should have expected this. The Prince was always one to hold a grudge. Not that I can blame him. I did hurt him after all. But I didn't mean to. I had a reason to do what I did, but it was still wrong. And now I look at him wearing this grim expression. He's changed so much, and yet so little, in the time we've been parted.-

Haldir was forced to break his thoughts as Aragorn and himself began speaking. Before he knew it, himself and the rest of the Lorien Guards he was with as well as the nine members of the Fellowship were on their way into Lothlorien.

-I must speak with him. I must tell him the reasoning behind my actions. Though I wouldn't be surprised if he never wanted to speak with me again.-

(After the meeting with Galadriel)  
_-Aragorn-_

-I was beginning to wonder what was bothering Legolas. He seemed very... distant during the travel to Lothlorien. When the Lorien Elves showed up, his mood did not lighten as I expected. I happened to notice he was not very fond of Haldir. I wonder if the Guardian of Lothlorien has anything to do with Legolas' sudden change of mood?-

Aragorn looked around the camp as he continued to ponder what was going on with his Elven friend.

"Aragorn, you must be hungry," Boromir said as he sat beside the other Man and handed him a plate of food. Aragorn took the plate and smiled warmly.

"Ah, thank you Boromir. I am quite famished actually." The two Men ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes.

"The woods of Lothlorien are quite breath-taking," said Boromir as he looked at the trees around him. He looked back to Aragorn. "We should explore them later." Aragorn raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"Indeed we should, but is it truly the trees of Lothlorien you wish to explore?" Boromir just smiled knowingly at the Ranger. A few more moments had passed. Aragorn's glance passed over the other members of the Fellowship. Gimli was too enthralled by the Lady of Light at the moment to even bother with eating. Merry and Pippin were quite delighted with their meal. Frodo and Sam were over in a corner, speaking quietly amongst themselves. Then his eyes fell upon the blonde Elf.

Legolas had distanced himself from the group and was sitting with his back against a tree and his legs crossed. Aragorn watched as the Elf slowly chewed on a piece of Lembas, seemingly oblivious to everything and everyone around him. It was then that he seemed to notice how beautiful Legolas truly was, with his long blonde hair and his piercing blue eyes that seemed never to end, his smooth pallid skin, and the eloquent voice, the grace his body moved in. He wondered what the blonde hair would look like in a mess of tangles, what it would feel like in his hands. He wondered what that graceful body would feel like beneath him, what that smooth skin would look like covered in sweat. He imagined what that voice would sound like screaming his name.

"Aragorn, is something wrong?" Boromir asked. Aragorn pulled his gaze from Legolas and looked back at Boromir, confused by his question.

"Well, it's just that you stare at the Elf for some unknown reason," Boromir explained.

"Oh, well I-" Aragorn paused for a moment. He couldn't tell Boromir that he was imagining himself ravishing the Elf. "I'm worried about him is all. He's seemed so distant since we've arrived in Lothlorien." Boromir nodded.

"I agree. The Elf does seem troubled. But he hasn't said anything, and I imagine that he does not wish to speak now, for if he did, he would." Aragorn just looked back at the Elf with a look that Boromir had taken for concern.

****

-Legolas-

Legolas had only taken about two bites from the Lembas before he re-wrapped it and set it down. He stood from his place and looked around a bit. He needed somewhere to think. He turned and walked into the woods without saying even so much as a goodbye to the rest of the Fellowship.

He didn't know how long he'd been walking before he found himself sitting by a small creak, absently running his hand over the cold water. He could hear someone approaching but paid no attention to whoever it was. He didn't care who it was. He just wanted to continue sitting by himself in peace.

"Legolas..."

His head snapped up as soon as he heard the voice behind him. He didn't care who it was... until he realized it was Haldir.


	2. Chapter 02

****

Authors Note: Hey everyone. I'm so sorry it took this long for an update. I was camping for the past week, making it impossible to update. But now that I'm back updates should show up more often. Also, I'm sorry this chapter is so short, but in order to make the storyline move along as it should I could only put a certain amount into this chapter. Thanks for reading and a great thanks to all the reviewers!

"Legolas..." The name slipped from his mouth as he stared fixedly at the blonde Elf sitting before him in front of the small creak. He hated seeing Legolas tense as he had just done because of him. A few moments of silence passed and Haldir decided he was going to say what he needed to, regardless of whether Legolas wanted him to or not.

"Legolas, I know you do not wish to speak to me, therefore, I will not ask you to reply if you do not want to do so. But please, do listen to what I have to say. I know that I have hurt you, and believe me when I say that I regret it every day of my life. If there was one thing I could change in my life, I would not have done what I did-" Before Haldir could finish the sentence, Legolas had stood up and turned around quickly and in Elven grace.

"Then why did you do it? Huh? Did you think laying with another would not upset me? For if you did you are rather stupid Haldir," Legolas said with the anger he felt clearly shown through his tone of voice. Haldir was taken aback. He had not expected this. He'd been hoping Legolas would listen and understand, or at the very least ignore him. But not lash out at him.

"Legolas, I.." Haldir stumbled on his words as he tried to piece together his thoughts and create an understandable sentence.

"What would you like me to say Haldir? I'm sorry but I can't just stand here and listen to what you have to say and accept this pathetic apology. Yes Haldir, you hurt me. And by the Valar I will not allow you to do so once again. I know now what I was then. I was a trophy for the March Warden. Laying with Prince of Mirkwood.. You surely must have been praised by other warriors for that accomplishment, huh? But that wasn't good enough was it?" Legolas stared coldly at Haldir yet again. His teeth clenched tightly as he seethed with anger. He let out a frustrated sigh and pushed by Haldir and began walking away from him.

Haldir stood shocked. He finally realized how badly he had truly hurt his ex-lover.

"Legolas, wait," he asked the younger Elf. But Legolas just kept walking.

"Please?" Haldir pleaded, breaking his braver outer appearance.

That one word _'please'_ stopped Legolas in his tracks. In all their years together as lovers, even in all the years Legolas had known Haldir as a friend or acquaintance, he had never heard that word fall from Haldir's lips. He let out a shaky breath and slowly turned around. He said nothing but showed that he was willing to listen. Haldir took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Legolas, you were much younger than me. You still are. At the time, you had just come of age. I was the first Elf you had ever lain with. You were the Prince of Mirkwood, as you are now, and I am still but a March Warden. I thought that after time you'd become tired of me. I thought you'd want a different lover, especially since you are a Prince. I.. I just wanted to hurt you before you could hurt me." Haldir paused for a moment. "I was afraid."

----

Aragorn and Boromir had been walking through the trees for some time before they stopped in a small clearing. Boromir had waited far too long to sneak away from the group with the other Man and wasted no time in roughly pushing his lips against Aragorn's. He could tell he was distracted. Whether by the dangerous mission they were on, or his troubled Elven friend, he did not know. He intended on gaining Aragorn's full attention at the moment however, and began untying the lacings of the Ranger's tunic. Just as he had pressed his lips to his chest, Aragorn pushed him back slightly. Boromir looked at him, slightly confused.

"What are-" Boromir began, but Aragorn placed his hand over his mouth.

"Shh," he whispered. Boromir was silent for a few moments before had heard two voices coming from the nearby creak. One he recognized as Legolas, and the other as the Lothlorien Guard that had stopped them earlier. Truthfully he did not care about the little lover's spat they were having, which was obvious from the exchange of words. But for some reason, Aragorn seemed very intent on hearing what was being said.

----

Legolas gulped and looked down in an attempt to hide the tears that were building in his eyes. He could hear the honesty in Haldir's shaking voice. Haldir had never admitted to being afraid of anything.

"I don't expect you to say anything and I don't expect you to fall in love with me again, or give me another chance. I know I hurt you, and I blame no one but myself for losing you. I just... I only wanted you to know that I meant it when I said I love you.. I still do mean it." Haldir stood, awaiting any reaction from Legolas.

"I believe you Haldir," Legolas could see a bit of hope shining through Haldir's eyes as he said this. "But I cannot fall in love with you again."


End file.
